Your whole life you have been lied to by the media, entertainment and advertising industry. In this post I’ll shine light on some of the most harmful lies we are being told every day.
No matter what they say, becoming attractive is not about buying designer clothes or applying perfumes that make you irresistible. That’s what ads and movies are trying to make us believe but it’s a lie!
True attractiveness, the kind that allows you to stop caring whether others find you attractive, is not achievable with quick fixes that you can buy in a store.
Lie #1 We have to be cool
Coolness is not about using clever words like James Bond does. If a guy in the real world talked like James Bond he would either be rushed to a psychiatrist or laughed at on 9gag or Tumblr.
Unlike in a Bond movie, no one gives you props for being too cool for school. It just comes across as arrogance which is one of the worst personal qualities you can have.
Coolness should be replaced by inner calmness. Having a calm and comforting energy is very attractive. It shows that you are a down to earth, good and authentic person. AND it makes you way more approachable! Coolness on the other hand just makes you come across as intimidating, even unreachable and if mixed with insecurity as arrogant.
If you want to instantly make a big step forward in dating and life drop the coolness!
I’ve found an inspiring quote from successful entrepreneur Barbara Corcoran about public speaking, but it’s also applicable to our case:
“When I told people how I really felt up there, and didn’t just act like a big shot, like I’m so cool… I could feel the love come at me. The audience instantly came over to my side. Let people see you stumble. They love it.”
Lie #2 We have to be perfect
The second big lie we have been told is that we have to be perfect all the time.
We see perfection everywhere we look, but it’s never real!
The supermodel from a billboard, the photograph of a tasty burger, or the porn starlet who gets an orgasm after 20 seconds of foreplay.
None of them are real!
The model, in addition to her natural beauty, trained with a personal trainer specifically for that photo shoot, dehydrated herself intentionally, had her hair and makeup done by incredible stylists and even after all of that she still needed “improving” in Photoshop. Does that seem like real life to you? But that’s the standard many guys have nowadays. They fall in love with images of women who don’t even exist!
Seeing all this perfection around us can make us and everything around us seem imperfect, faulty or even broken. But the truth is, everyone has flaws just like you and me!
We are all just humans. Even the sexiest model has bad breath in the morning and clogs the toilet once in a while!
Often the people we think are the closest to perfection are the ones with the most insecurities.
They seem so perfect because they do everything in their power to hide their faults. They are so driven by the fear of other people finding out about them that they have become great actors and illusionists.
What can we learn from this? No one is perfect. Everybody has problems just like you and me whether you see them or not. Improve everything you can and learn to love what you can’t.
Lie #3 We must have it now
The third big lie we are being told all the time is that we must have anything right now or otherwise it’s gone forever!
Think about it, can you get better deals if you buy something in a rush, or when you don’t even think about it and just happen to stumble upon a great deal?
You always get a better deal in life if you don’t need it immediately!
This little piece of wisdom holds not only true when buying items on Ebay but also to human relationships.
If you really really want exactly that one special girl and no one else in the world, what do you think your chances of being with her are? My prediction – not good. Why? Because you come from a point of neediness and desperation.
Compare that to a guy who is happy with his life as is. He has many friends, goes out frequently, and has no problem hooking up with interesting women if he feels like it.
If he stumbles upon a special girl that is a great fit for him then he would love to start a relationship with her but not at all costs. He is perfectly happy with his life even without a girlfriend, why would he settle for less?
Enjoy your life and seize the opportunities on the road.
So again what can we learn from all of this?
She might be a cool girl, but she is not the only one! If she is not a good fit for you move on! There are more than 7 billion people currently living on earth. About 800 million of which are women in their 20s and early 30s. If you are an average 25-year-old man, then you probably haven’t met more than 10.000 women in your entire life. (10.000 is more than one woman/day since you were born)
That means you have met at most about 0,00125% of all women in your age group. Based on those numbers it’s very likely that there is someone out there that is just as good or better for you than your current crush.
Next time before you act rashly force yourself to sleep over it. Whether it’s sending an angry email, calling your crush drunk at 4 a.m, or buying an expensive piece of clothing to impress someone, at least sleep one night over it! If you still want it afterwards you have my blessing, but trust me, this will save you from so much trouble!
I know that all of this is easier said than done. After all, we behave crazy because we are too emotional in the moment. That’s why I strongly suggest that you join our Secret Group on Facebook by signing up to the Lovelifesolved.com newsletter. Next time you are about to act out of emotion, just post what you are about to do in the Secret FB Group and you will get honest feedback whether we think it’s a good or a bad idea.
What other lies are we being told by the media? Share your thoughts with me in the comments.
Thanks for reading this far!