Why Humor is Attractive to Women
When I was a kid, I somehow picked up on the fact that making girls laugh was attractive to them. So I did what every elementary school kid would have done; I tried to make all the cute girls laugh as often as possible.
There was a problem, however: Yes, I got all the girls to laugh, but to my surprise, still, none of them was interested in me. What was going on?
The problem was that they didn’t laugh because I was so funny. They laughed about the goofy stuff I did and the outrageous things I said. Truth be told, I was the class clown. And trust me, no one wants to date a clown.
But my original premise was correct. A great sense of humor is one of the most attractive traits a man can have. In this article, I will shine some light on why women are so enthralled by funny guys and then share a few quick tips that have helped me become funnier.
Humor takes all negative thoughts away
When you make a joke, people react to it involuntarily. Humor grabs and forces them to be in the moment.
While laughing, it’s impossible to worry or doubt. So, making someone laugh is almost like a gift that takes all negative thoughts away – if only for a few seconds.
Humor makes you more trustworthy
Humor can act as a catalyst in the process of winning trust. People who make us laugh seem safe. Even more so, we want to have them around.
This doesn’t just apply to meeting women. The same is true for networking, climbing up the career ladder, and making friends. Humor is the entry ticket to a world of possibilities.
Humor is a preselector
Everyone is into different types of humor.
What one person thinks is funny is dead boring to others. But that’s a good thing! Everyone has their audience. It might be small, but once you identify it, these people will think you are the funniest guy in the world.
So, if you are sarcastic, own it! If you like racist jokes, good luck to you, but own it! If you like dead baby jokes…ok, these go too far. Never try to censor yourself. Just be unapologetically who you are, and you will automatically sort out the people who are not your crowd. And trust me, you don’t want to entertain a crowd that doesn’t think you are funny.
Imagine Louis CK in front of an auditorium filled with hundreds or even thousands of people. And every single one of his jokes bombs. Would he keep trying to entertain that crowd for years? Probably not, and the same is true for you. You don’t want to be that guy.
Humor shows the truth
You can fake a smile and laughter, but it’s usually easy to identify. So, when you get someone to laugh hard you can be pretty sure it’s real. Not only, does this allow you to see if she is interested in you, but it’s also a good way for her to find out if what the two of you have is real.
Humor makes others comfortable
Making others comfortable in your presence is paramount. No one likes awkwardness when interacting with strangers.
A fun story, especially paired with vulnerability, can break the ice in almost any situation. And you can always start one. Just use an intro like: “This situation right here reminds me of the one time I…”
Or: “Have you ever heard about…?”
It works 100% of the time and you can test, and perfect, your stories beforehand.
Humor shows confidence
To be humorous you have to put yourself out there. No one ever laughed because a guy stood silently in the corner. You have to tell stories, make controversial or even slightly offensive remarks, recite jokes without screwing up the punch line, and so on. It puts you in the spotlight. And to handle being the center of attention you have to be confident in yourself.
Humor can hint at sexual confidence
A humorous remark with a touch of sexuality shows that you are comfortable expressing your sexual side.
Most insecure men always want to stay safe. They avoid anything that could be offensive. But staying safe is the sure fire way to going home alone.
By adding some sexuality to your humor, you become more controversial. Yes, some women might be offended, but you didn’t want to end up with those prudes, anyway.
A few tips:
- Stay away from dirty jokes and obscenity. They can work, but usually, not unless both of you are wasted.
- Subtle use of sexual language at the right time is key.
- Ambiguous remarks have proven effective. (watch The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson for a terrific display)
- Everyone has a different threshold for how much sexuality in a conversation is too much. So turn it up slowly or you’ll risk making her uncomfortable.
Humor shows social intelligence
Fun people are usually masters at observing their surroundings, especially human behavior. It takes a lot of experience in social settings as well as an expert sense for social norms to crack a group of people up.
Most guys who ask me what they can do to become funnier actually don’t have a problem with humor. They have a problem with sensing what is appropriate and what is not.
Because most men try to be funny but screw it up due to a lack of social intelligence, the guys who are able to make women laugh stand out like a sore thumb.
Humor makes you sympathetic
Let’s be honest. If we think someone is fun, most of the time, we’ll also like that person.
Closing thoughts on how to become funnier
I’ll be honest with you, I can’t teach you humor. There are just too many subtleties like your tone of voice, pace, empathy, body language, eye contact,… that determine if others find you funny.
I can give you tips from my personal experience, however, that have helped me become quicker on my feet and more fun to be around in general:
- Create your own memes and post them on the internet. Can you get strangers to upvote and share your stuff?
- Listen and watch standup comedians you like. Then rewatch them and identify all the different kinds of humor that they use.
- Test different versions of your jokes and stories and see which ones get the best response with who.
- Sit down on a park bench from which you can see many people. Then closely observe everything that happens. Over time you will start to see how people act when they are insecure, excited, anxious, restless, stressed, euphoric,… and you will be able to identify the comedic aspects of their behavior. As a bonus, you will spot a ton of fun situations that make for great little stories.
What else could someone do to become funnier? Do you know a special technique that has helped you or someone you know? Help the other readers out by sharing your tips in the comment section below.