There is one technique to change behavior that you already use but probably don’t take full advantage of. I call it Awareness, Attention & Conscious Change. You can use it to change pretty much everything that you don’t like about yourself. It costs nothing and is proven to work. Come check it out.
“Julian, you sound like a fucking robot.” His words hit me like a freight train. “Every time you talk on the phone, your voice sounds monotonous, and cold, and basically just really boring.” Shocked, all I could reply was, “Thanks, I guess.”
I recently got a message from a reader, asking me how to stop thinking that everyone is constantly looking at him. Fortunately, I had the exact same problem a while ago and was able to fix it.
Vulnerability is the key to bonding with others. Just look at every single movie with well-written dialogues. Screenwriters are experts in coming up with conversations that don’t bore. And their number one tool for keeping conversations interesting is vulnerability.
Every couple fights – often about the stupidest shit. Arguments like, “Why did you look at her like that?”, “Where the fuck have you put my soccer shoes again?”, or even the classic, “You never listen to me!” are common in relationships. But it doesn’t have to be that way! There are ways to stop arguments before they even begin. And there are techniques to stop a fight from escalating and causing irreparable emotional damage.
At a nightlife spot where the music is blasting and everyone is standing, if you look around, you’ll see that most people aren’t enjoying themselves.
Picture this situation: You just saw an amazing documentary about rock climbing on TV and now you want to learn how to climb. So you try to convince your friends to learn it together. Unfortunately, your friends couldn’t care less about pulling their own weight up a vertical wall. You are stuck. Either you go and learn how to climb on your own, or you bury your plans, to conquer the big walls, for now and wait until your friends eventually “feel like it”. What should you do?
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost / The Road Not Taken
I guess Robert Frost didn’t have self-improvement advice in mind when he wrote his famous poem “The Road Not Taken”. It makes for a fantastic tip, though, so I’ll borrow the last verse to explain how changing your ways can improve your life.
I was actually curious about what it was like to be a hot girl for a long time. So I carried out an experiment. I became one, online for 2 weeks.